One or two generations ago, Indian immigrants tended to come from India’s Anglophile elite. For example, in 1992 back before the World Wide Web, I helped set up a UseNet discussion group on the early Internet for fans of P. G. Wodehouse, the finest English comic writer of the 20th Century. About half of the first hundred or so people to join had multisyllabic Indian names.
But times change.
Maybe they will keep on changing.
From the New York Times:
Christian Butcher Announces Bid to Become Prime Minister of India
January 1, 2076
Ben Kensinger reported from Lucknow, Uttar Pradesh, India.
Cheeseburger entrepreneur Christian Butcher, leader of the fast-growing American-Indian community in India, announced today, on the 50th anniversary of the stunning Trump-Modi Pact of 2026 that inaugurated unlimited migration between India and the United States, that he would run for leadership of the ruling Hindu nationalist party and, thus, Prime Minister of India. “We’re already in the red zone and our team is going to push the pigskin into the end zone,” the confident candidate promised his cheering supporters.
Flanked by his seven sons, Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Paul, George, and Ringo, the 6’6” 350 pound owner of over 2,000 Burger King franchises throughout India made his speech in Lucknow, capital of Uttar Pradesh, at half time of the annual Beef Bowl that determines the college football (tackle-style) champion of India. Mr. Butcher had been named MVP of the initial Beef Bowl in 2051 when his University of East West Virginia Carnivores defeated the Institute of the Little Sisters of the Poor Vegetarians 77-0.
Sitting on the dais was Mr. Butcher’s younger brother, the Reverend Waylon Butcher, charismatic pastor of the largest Evangelical megachurch in Uttar Pradesh, who has controversially constructed atop it a 400-foot tall statue of Jesus eating a Whopper.
In a touching moment, Mr. Butcher brought out his orphaned nephews, Rudyard, Clive, Winston, and Babington Butcher. They are the sons of Mr. Butcher’s late brother, Dr. Remington Butcher, long time president of the U. of East West Virginia and author of such influential tomes as India’s Enemy: The Brahmins, The Brahmins’ Unforgivable Sin: Racism Against Whites, and his bestselling self-help guidebook Your Grandchildren Can Be White Too. Dr. Butcher was assassinated last year by violent extremists within the populist movement outraged by his moderate stance in favor of merely deporting all remaining Brahmins to the United States.
Then Mr. Butcher announced the opening of his expansive new theme park in Uttar Pradesh, Grill Land, which features the world’s first 10,000 yard long golf course, a shooting range large enough for firing electric rail guns at drones, a game preserve where guests will hunt feral cows from helicopters with AR-15s, and 10,000 charcoal grills.
Of the 900,000 peasants displaced to build the resort, over half have migrated to West Virginia.
Also on hand to lend support to Butcher’s potent populist coalition were leaders of his political allies from the Untouchables, Scheduled Tribes, and Backward Scheduled Castes.
The Butcher brothers were born in Uttar Pradesh in the first wave of MAGA immigrants to India. Their parents from Scrabble, West Virginia were at first shocked by President Trump unexpectedly opening America’s borders to all 1.46 billion Indians. But, they came to reason, as the world’s greatest dealmaker, Mr. Trump must have sensed opportunity for Americans in India.
The first Trumpites to move to India were pleased to find …
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